Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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