whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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