So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
