What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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