I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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