I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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