Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
