Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
it was like eating out sand paper
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
