Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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