either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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