White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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