Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize