I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize