Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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