Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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