omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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