so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize