..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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