Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize