He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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