how can u be prego again
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
