She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My feet surprised me
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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