No awkward lesbian experiences without me
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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