just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
