Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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