where am i from again
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
