I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
im six kinds of drunk right now
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
