if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
