Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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