Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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