you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
