Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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