Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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