perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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