I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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