She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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