You can't special order awesome
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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