She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
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She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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