I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
