I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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