JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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