Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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