You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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