how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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