he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
