Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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