I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
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I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
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do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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