This girl is more easily done than said...
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
