Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
