Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
