I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I am naked and annoyed.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
