My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
