seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
